I hope you are doing well. I think of you from time to time and hope you are happy and safe.
I wanted to say goodbye to you. I'm not going to write you a letter or put up website content to treat your mental illness. No....I'm done with all of that. I've said my peace.
Nobody really cares anyway. People that know you and your siblings? Really? Notice you all don't have many friends? Not being mean, but it's the truth. Nobody cares about you, me, your mental illness, or my little boys.
I put the website content up for you people. Nobody else. It all had to be true, otherwise...it' would have been for nothing. I had to show you kids.....what you did...and what I did. You have to see who you guys are in the mirror. I told you kids you were special, geniuses, better than others...I did that to build your self esteems. Had I known then that you all suffered from something that was totally alien to me....I wouldn't have done that. Narcissism..I didn't know. I didn't even know what that illness and disorder was.
I didn't want to be a counselor or a psychologist. I wanted to be an attorney. When your brother and sisters were screened for early childhood language delay, I realized I would have to drop out of college just to care for you kids. Not you....but them. They needed too much stimulation and attention. We both know how Julie was, so she wasn't going to do what needed to be done. So, I did something horribly boring and not interesting to me in the least....accelerating children's cognitive development...ugh!
It was either that...developmental psychology and child development, or I withdraw from my university studies. So, I made you kids my education. I didn't have to ignore you guys while I went to school.....you guys became my school.
OMG....then when I went to graduate school, I had to have "experience in the field" so what did I do...work for the registry at the county psyche annex. Great! Then abused children at AZBCS. Then I graduated to CPES...Arnold said 73 percent of Americans hate their jobs and yeah...I hated mine with a passion! Definitely NOT what I wanted to be doing with my life.
$234,000 in student load debt and no PhD. Wow. Ya'll flunked the empathy test on that one. Sorry...college don't cost that much unless you go to Harvard...and I didn't go there (wish I had for a quarter million dollars in student loan debt). Yeah....I maxed out every year on student loans, not for tuition and books son, but for you kids. You kids? Yeah, someone had to watch you....and accelerate you from an IQ.....low....wanna see? Call the school district and order you guys school records. Do it...it's free. I spent my 20s on you kids...Mr. Dad. You guys remember that? Sure. You care? No...you have to have empathy to care.
You were a pretty normal kid up to a year before the divorce. I was so proud of you and you know it. I told you all the time.
Then after the divorce, you guys weren't bonkers. You got a better word for it? Be my guest. Yeah, arson...shoplifiting...and as if the barrage of theft and burglaries weren't bad enough....you shoplifted Barnes and Noble and stole every witchcraft and satanic book you found. I had a talk with Trembley's grandpa...then he started talking his "Goddess Athena" crap...ugh...so that's why his grandson was so weird lol. That freaked your aunt Paula out OMG...tripped me out too. Karen and Chis tried babysitting you guys, that was funny. I was so mad I had to withdraw from graduate school after taking so much in loan debt to that point. You guys just didn't care.
Vandalizing the house in the middle of the day, neighbors house....behind our alley....yeah...the neighbor took pictures and blew them up 8 x 10 just to make a point to the landlord...."get them out of here" Yeah, we had to leave there. You boys were never around to watch your sisters after school or in the evening until 9pm when I came home...it was the neighbor parents....Samantha's mom...Brittany's mom....they watched the girls while you boys ran wild.....you didn't care. You didn't have "empathy". So, we left that home and yeah...I really had to worry about my little girls when I was at work from then on. Thanks for that.
We laughed when told of you throwing cats off roofs in the neighborhood. I guess it wasn't funny. Animal abuse. I didn't know to react...you kids were so bizarre. Got a better word for it? I don't.
Then she came back for a "visit" in 2005. I didn't connect the dots. That was the year I first had you admitted to St. Luke's Behavioral. That killed me....your break...you never came back from that, did you.
Wolfgang went to visit you there with me....he said "I lost my friend." He did...you were gone.
Looking back I remember stuff. You know....you never tested for cognitive delays. You didn't have an IQ showing cognitive "retardation". You were always...gifted. Wanna know why? Because you're my son.
I was all about child development and cognitive development. I avoided abnormal psychology and personality disorder. How is that? Huh? How does one graduate with a bachelors in Psychology, attend graduate school, but avoided personality disorders as a subject matter, and if I learned it, how did I forget that? Huh?
I think I know why now. Subconsciously, I knew. I knew you kids were "messed up". I didn't want to face that. Repressed it. Fixed it, made you kids smart, grow your dendrites, and then "not a problem" huh.
Well, I know abnormal psychology and personality disorders now. Thanks.
But....you didn't have the "abnormal brain" so...why are you so mentally ill? Huh?
You were never special needs....no language delay....no speech therapy....not you. Christopher was a straight A student with gifted IQ from the first testing. They weren't. Maybe they thought you were better than them? Not too safe in have a family of narcissists with a brother smarter, more handsome, stronger....and made his dad proud...look it up!
Nope....not you....you didn't have the cognitive malfunctions they did. I had to be sure....so do you remember when you were at Saint Luke's? I had them give you an MRI to check your head....for brain injuries...scateboarding.....
The MRI did not show any brain problems...no anomalies. A normal brain. Hmmmmm.
So, why so mentally ill? Environment? People had worse environments than what Julie put you kids through. But...that was the year...2005.....of Julie's visit....wasn't it...yep.
I knew why you were mentally ill....I always knew...but it's not sane in 2005 to believe in "demons" or UFO's...but it's not 2005 anymore, Chis...it's 2021....and Carl Jung was right after all....the "shadow" and demonism. Yeah, he was right. UFOs? Well....come to find out...they are real too now.
I shouldn't have told you guys my dreams of having two more kids. That's where I screwed up. It wouldn't have mattered....you would have seen how much I loved those little boys and you kids still would have done what you did.
Come to find out...there's no rhyme or reason why people like you and your family does things you do. Narcissists have no point.....they have hate. Unfounded hate based on delusions that you can find out on your own. I ain't wasting my breath.
What I learned about that "hate"....that narcissism....is that they hurt people....family like me...who are not narcissist....they like causing pain. They like tormenting. They steal happiness....they don't want others to have joy...they destroy that for reasons you maybe already know...or just don't care to find out.
Jennifer did that to Marcus. Told him their baby had blonde hair and blue eyes because I had those white features and he was mixed race. Wow....she pulled that lie off. Wild! Make a black man think a blonde hair, blue eyed, white baby was his. Then he was told at that party...by the actual boys father...punked Marcus.
You wanna know what's so sad about that...he already knew. He wasn't a dummy. He never told me he already knew....its just common sense. He fathered that little boy because he loved him....Marcus has empathy....narcissists like your sister target empaths and make them victims....don't take my word for it....look it up.
I know, always knew, about Nicholas. What am I going to do? You were mentally ill. More shit I had to deal with. You think if Breanna's dad knew all this narcissistic shit you people put me though, think he would understand why I was dick to him? You bet he would. So would she.
I have pictures of your kid with her btw...birthday party pic...blown up 8 x 10. You know...I forgot how I got that. It will come to me...everything does.
I want to thank you and your family.
I had no meaning. I had my boys, and I love them sooo much. I miss them every day. That's why you kids did that...to make me suffer. Well...I miss them....but I'm not suffering. Sorry...I did for a long time. Not anymore.
I sat on my dad's couch...what can I say. I guess he had pity on me because, Christopher, I have been targeted by demonic attack for most my life. Through her...and you kids. Narcissists. You can't love God with all your heart and you can't love your brother more than yourself if you have no empathy...so yeah...demons. Looks like humans, talks like humans, eats like humans, sleeps like humans....but....lacks that one trait that makes us children of God...the capacity to love others....empathy.
Elect for salvation and elect for damnation? That's Calvinism. Did Calvin know about brain abnormalities in narcissists who have no capacity for love and empathy....the requirement of the two commandments Christ commanded: love God with all your heart and your brother more than yourself. I had a disagreement with a priest the other day about this very subject, but he was taken back....because....your siblings cognitive issues identified in early childhood and their adult behaviors of malignant narcissism....that's markers for abnormalities in the brain....no empathy....look it up.
I wish I could help you. There is no biological or neurological reason for your mental illness, unless something changed from the MRI you got in 2005 and now.
I forget which comittal...but the one when Mike Jr. had to pick you up at the security office at GCC....you came home and went upstairs and started screaming.
I went upstairs, worried....and froze outside your bedroom door in horror. You weren't with me when I was a kid. You don't know what my mother used to say to my dad...every day for years. Well...I was freaked out because you were yelling that at loud, "Fat illegitimate bastard" and other things my mother would say to my dad. I never told you my dad was adopted. Are we Greek? by adoption...not blood. We don't know what nationality we are. My mom reminded my dad of that daily...."fat illegitimate bastard"....and there you were...screaming something I would never admit to you...that we weren't Greek.
Demonic. Generational demon. Look it up, you will find it. Jung.
Your girlfriend had a mental breakdown herself when you were in the hospital...remember that. What is the chance...same symptoms! Her mother committed her to the mental hospital as well. I think of that baby from time to time.
You guys ever see Elizabeth anymore? Nope....for a very long time. I know why....you do too.
There's your answers. So...take up your matt and walk, huh?
You didn't destroy me. Sorry you didn't. And although I put up a lot of content...it's not my obsession.
Wanna know what my obsession is? Huh? What you guys created? Law school, thanks...I wouldn't have done that if you kids didn't do what you did.
I work with parents like me now...adult victims of narcissistic abuse. I show them these websites. It helps them understand "why". The answer....there's no reason why. Look it up.
I also an a political activist. OMG...yeah...I knock down the door to legislators (not literally hehe). There is an actor I will not name that I contacted on Facebook but....your story was too much for him omg lol.
So thank you. By doing what you people did to me for decades, culminating in the dog and pony show at DCS....that brought me to my Dad....his couch....his healings...his blessings....and now...I do his will. I do his will by helping people and fighting corruption and advocating for parents who have been destroyed by malignant family members like you and your siblings.
I would not be doing right now what I am doing, had you kids not done what you did.
Because of you...I do my Father's will.
So no...I am not consumed by anything than what I am doing right now....helping people and gi
Demons attack my family? Alright...well...then I attack demons and fight all forms of evil and corruption against children and innocent parents. I guess you made me the Dragonslayer lol. Thanks.
I was going to put up more websites with photos of you and your siblings. I have a lot of me holding, feeding, playing, holidays, vacations...etc. Naa...not going to do that. What's the point? No point. So...no.
I'm waking away now. I only did these websites for the hopes the truth would heal you kids. But no...that's an empaths dream...."they will change"...hmmmm....remember what I told you lots before....people don't change.
Before I wrote this, I was thinking of you as a baby. I was going to computer school at Charter College in Anchorage and I got to watch you when I was not at school....actually....I was the only one watching you because Julie worked 70 hours a week as a manager and Cinnabuns. Whatever...I got to be with you and Michael and I loved it.
I was so proud of you as a baby...another boy wow. I gave you so much vitamins...fed you so fat...you were fat...not because you were a fat baby...but because I pigged you out lol. Loved you so much.
Maybe you were born with the same brains as them...but I showed you so much love and put so much food an vitamins in you OMG...whatever....you weren't like them.
I don't know what I'm going to do with all you guys' kid pictures. I would have burned them by now, but that's something my mom would have done, so I don't do that. I don't want to put those pics in storage, because I know they will be there and I want to erase all memories of you and your siblings. You guys have copies...yeah....I'm gonna burn them.
I've done my last bit of parenting with these websites. I'm walking away now. But I have one thing to say to you before I erase you all.
Christopher....I love you.
There's always hope...so I leave you with this.
There is a man I learned about. He was a slave trader. For decades...his entire adult life....he was a slave trader. He ran cargo ships from Africa to the Americas....every day of every year for decades....death...torture...starvation...what he did to black people....every day....throwing them off ships...whippings....starvings....evil.
We can't go back and do an MRI on that guy or check out his brain, but there is a high likelihood that someone like that had no empathy.....he probably had the same brain anomalies like most narcissists do...incapable of love for one's brother or God....no empathy....narcissist brain.
Something happened to that slave trader one day.
God came to him and gave him empathy. He came to love God, freed his cargo of slaves, for the rest of his life, loved God with all his heart and his brother more than himself.
This man wrote a song about the gift of empathy and the grace of God's love which literally saved a wretch like him. This is his song, and this is my goodbye....
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now am found
Was blind but now I see
Was Grace that taught my heart to fear
And Grace, my fears relieved
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed
Through many dangers, toils and snares
We have already come
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far
And Grace will lead us home
And Grace will lead us home
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost but now am found
Was blind but now I see
Was blind, but now I see
September 3, 2021 update: Michael Robertson changed his mind. Christopher is a litigant in the adoption fraud and his gross defamation of his father's reputation is also being published to the community where his falsehoods were published:
Copyright © 2022 Michael Bacolas Threat To Children - All Rights Reserved.
Powered by Duty to Report